A Full Size Happy Meal

On yesterday I was so grateful to hear some exciting, instead of hearing "can we collect this debt in the amount of...". I was rehearsing some lines and I received a phone call to appear in a major upcoming movie. "How big is that honey"? I said; my wait has not been in vein. I must be coming to the light Carol Ann.
Now that's what you call a Happy Meal with benefits. More news brought to you later. "Rrrr"!

Re-run Bio Introduction

STANDUP: Chicken Factories shutting down. If you didn't know, chickens are now equipped with that new technology. They have what you call radar. They have become smart now and they running, refusing to be eaten. Chickens have caught on to our underhanded ways and realize they are the best meal on Sunday Evening". "Every Chicken farm in the U.S. work overtime on Sunday", "just to give everyone a piece of bird on their dinner table". So, what I have decided to do is take inventory, by calculating the show of hands times the remaining Chicken Factories that are still open for business. I need to know, if I will be able to get my piece of chicken on next Sunday? I'm just being real. Can I be real with you?

When you think of creativity, inspiration, truth, and humor; “Realist” fits all the above. Known to many as a comediac, performer, writer, or spoken word artist, that speaks truth, with humor. "REALIST", delivers and set the atmosphere on stage with crazy life stories, an enjoyable atmosphere,with real life situasions. STANDUP: "Nothing like your car breaking down in morning traffic and people are cruel". People trying to get to work and you "were" trying to drive across town on E to pick up a number 3 breakfast value meal".

"Now you hitting the dash board mad", "wishing you stayed home", "while people behind you blowing the horn", "yelling profain language out the window". "We think of the most things to do when there is no gas in the car".

She can also be known as "The Renaissance Lady", do to her many talents. 

 She has lived the majority of her life on stage and behind the scenes of stage plays, novels, music, and background vocals. Born into a family of musicians, writers, and singers "REALIST", took the craft and turned it into more than a hobby. She is no stranger to her childhood love, the art of writing, singing, and performing, which she began at a very young age.

She reflects back on the many days, singing background, along with others, for her mother and family. 

"Realist" is a native of North Carolina, where she embrace the roots of the caribbean lifestyle.

She started her career at the age of ten and gives a lot of her credit to God and Mrs. Wanda Needham, her fifth grade teacher that admired her gift of writing, entering her into several writing and art contest. Her words of encouragment, "never to give up on writing", was branded in Realist heart.

"Realist" grasped those words of encouragment and turned her writing into a career. Writing poetry, novels, stageplays, entertainment scripts, advertisements, she masters it all.

Realist is active in her community, volunteering throughout her city, with non-profit organizations, helping with fundraisers, the homeless and families that are in need. Her volunteering extends far as Jamaica W.I. where she travels on a regular basis. She leader and holds many positions.

In her words, Life is not all about me, the little or big "I'" and "U". If you have a craft and gift to help someone, use it. If I can’t help someone along the way, then what am I here or living for? I love to teach and bring a positive message to everyone that has an ear to listen, especially our youth. “Inspite of what’s going on or wrong in our lives”, “we have to keep pushing”, no matter what the cost, "keep pushing".

Direction

Righ about now, I don't know which way to go. Should I blow with the wind or against the wind?

Current Project

Current Project is going "great". Who else could play a better homeless person?

Things a Man Should and Shouldn't Carry

With so many styles in the world, I wonder how so many people keep up. There is no wrong way, when it comes to style. In my book, do you, wear what you feel, long as you not naked. Some days I don't feel like looking for the right sock, shoe or finding the right color shirt to match my bottoms. After I leave the house, somedays it's quite noticable.

I often pass men that carry shoulder bags. These are men that are involved with woman, but the numbers seem to be expanding. I look to the left, then to the right... men with handbags, not diaper bags. I feel a man should keep a wallet. A wallet says; masculine and strong. When a man is holding a handbag, I feel if we get robbed, he's going to give up his handbag, run and leave me to defend myself.

I can't imagine being at a restaurant and he's about to pay for dinner, then say; "hold up, I need to grab my purse". Whatabout being at the store or movies with my man and we both rambling through our purse for money. You know how much stuff woman carry in their purse, except for the kitchen sink. If he has over three items in his bag and its not a book... a mirror, gum and chapstick, something wrong. He's not your man, he's your girlfriend. That's one sign, out of the other five you havn't caught on too, that he is trying to tell you something. And the sign is not, he checking you out, or love working on cars and playing football. Real men carry wallets.

Understanding of Comediac Realist

So, someone ask; "why do you call yourself Cooomediac Realist"?  It's because I bring real talk to the stage. I bring real life situasion to the forefront that most people don't talk about. The definition of Comediac means, performer with three or more acts. I'm an artist that bring more than one character to the stage. To sum it up, I have more than one personality at the right time. Sometimes the personalities show up to brighten up the atmosphere.

"SCARED TO EAT"?

Why some woman scared to eat in front of a man? If he does not like the way you chew, tell him. "food can only go one way". Tell him, "close his eyes or look the other way".  My friend was asked out on a date. I was happy for her because all she do is love and hug her sofa everyday, eating suga babies, chip, dip and cookies, watching Lifetime.
Heffa come back to the house hungry, talking about, "lets go get something to eat". I told her she didn't go on any date, he must have held her hostage, the entire date. Only hungry hostages and crack heads ramble and pace back and forth through cabinets and refrig, knowing the same items were there a minute ago.

I asked where did he take her. It had to be somewhere, where food was not present. My friends says; "she went to the finest restaurant, where only the big spender go". Her date told her, she could order anything from the menu. We talking, fifteen, twenty and thirty dollar plates, that's without the cost of drink. (Lol)

Why this heffa say; "she ordered a salad becaise she was scared to eat"? "WHAT"! You have sat in the house for 365 days eating ginger snaps and tootie rolls, wishing you could go on a date. You finally get a date and order a salad. Honey he can look at you and tell you eating more than salad at home.

I told her she should have ordered and saved it for one of her hungry attacks. So, I reached for a plate out the cabinet, put a doughnut, chip, dip and some ginger snaps on it and said; "I'm scared to go outside late at night, to get food, "goodnight". "See you in the morning".

Unbearable Wind

O.K. ladies, "hold on to your weave and wigs"! This wind is so unbearable, I can't keep my hair in place. I fill sorry for the ladies with the 10' inch an long weave. I know it's just slapping them all in the face. It's like wave tides out here in the streets.

Day of Life

Today was more than a pleasant day, it was a blessing to live above the soil. I searched my body over. I had the same amount of toes and fingers that I had the day before. Although, the air is polluted, I inhaled, then exhaled without suffering from any breathing complications. I could put one foot in front of the other and not stumble. Then I yelled to the atmosphere, "HELLO WORLD"! "IT'S GREAT TO BE ALIVE"! My voice sounded back. Once again, I yelled to the atmosphere and my voice sounded back. I'm awake, I'm alive, I can move and I'm here to survive.
Someone, somewhere wish they had good health, strength and the opportunity to do that much.
Live, Laugh, Love, Be Thankful

Things that Make You Say "Mmm"

Sights that blind you during a sunny day. I heard of women packing and stuffing coins, gift certificates, keys, money, whatever can fit in their breast. You know the bigger the breast, the more breast can tote around more items, like a tote bag. Never have I heard of anything such as food items or baby toys being carried around in woman breast, but everything has a first time. This girl just pulled a nasty magic trick, as if she was pulling a rabbit out of a hat. Tell me, she did not just pull a pacifier from her breast, then popped it into her babies mouth like she was feeding him a bottle? Baby frowned up, spits the pacifier back out like he wanted to tell mom a thing or too. That baby probably was saying; "this not Enfamil". "This is bitter tits, you not fooling nobody". Mom puts the pacifier back into her tote bag (her breast) for safe keeping. Maybe she has lost so many in the past and have to keep that one locked and sealed in a safe place. In the in end, I found out she wasn't the babies mother. "YUCK"!

Airplane Gone Wild

Can you say; "HOT WATER"? While many of us worry about safe arrivals at the next airport, these college students worry about getting their Harlem Shack, Shack on. The experience of turbulance added more fun and rythem to their Shack.You will never be able to say; no one has ever danced or moon walked on air. Only thing this plane was missing, was tinted windows and 20 inch rims. Could this be the new club in the future?